PPD: Post Production Depression

Oh, man. We're in post production for the documentary so we're going through all the footage of the interviews and developing the organization and the story we have in the footage to tell. It's a fun part of the process since every documentary always starts with a plan and by the time you shoot and in editing, the plan has changed itself twenty times. It's like giving birth to a story you couldn't have dreamed of.

We were able to keep it together during shooting okay, but going back over and re-living the interviews and seeing these people be so vulnerable, sometimes scared, sometimes mad, sometimes guilty and three now with a criminal record, allowing themselves to be arrested in civil disobedience. For so many people in this country that do a whole lot of nothing, in this work we get to see a whole lot of people doing a whole lotta great things. They are a part of the solution, not the problem.

It's an honor to know them, but also realizing that here in 2005, not 1665, we are still getting lessons from God on how to respect everyone and love everyone unconditionally. It hurts so much to see people in pain...utterly unnecessarily in great great pain. Hours and hours of research and footage all about hurting people. People in soul-ful pain. Ugh, my gosh, it's just so hard to bare sometimes.

We are taking this work very seriously. It's about people's lives. Real people with real problems. It's a huge lesson in compassion for me. I hurt with these people. But I know there's hope. I know life can still be lived and won. I know it. My faith becomes more and more unshakable in this knowing.

It's so emotional for us, but pushing us to grow and be more spiritually available. We don't know what will happen with this work and it's already starting a life of its own, but I know working on it and seeing it coming to fruition has already changed my life.