Sunny San Bernardino

San Bernardino had the most perfect weather. It was warm and beautiful. The only downside was the smoke in the air dusting up the horizon from the wildfires set by arson that had killed firefighters. What can a person be thinking by setting a fire in dry brush on a hill near homes and a university? The loss of nature, lives, animals…it makes me shudder. Not to mention that those trees, those green leafy things I see too often being cut down and replaced by concrete is our source of oxygen. We’ll suffocate without them and they are burning down in these wildfires as well. I won’t dwell on this topic since we believe what we focus on expands so I’ll focus on lots and lots of trees…therefore lots and lots of oxygen. Inhale...

The screening at California State University San Bernardino was really fun. We had great questions as usual – which we don’t take for granted, we’re very appreciative of the level of quality questions and integrity in keeping the discussion at a safe space for everyone. We had a student say he’s considered a conservative Christian and just the fact that he came we really wanted him to know how appreciative we were that he was there. He broke stereotype by attending and asking a great question and was open to the answer we offered. We have a ton of respect for people who come to the movie who may already think they know what to believe about the topic but don’t get stuck and/or stop at the title: God & Gays. They still take the time to hear something new, something that’s not openly talked about in this way in their circle. They are stepping out of their comfort zone and that’s a sign of spiritual maturity and for that we are grateful!

I also got to experience a student’s dilemma of talking to a friend who pretends he’s not gay but when he thinks no one is looking, he’s with guys in secret. My heart was aching for this friend and for the student. It’s not easy bringing a deliberately avoided subject up in conversation. The student cared and wanted to tell the friend she was accepting and supportive of him and wanted him to basically stop lying through his behavior to her and others….that he didn’t have to and that the friends loved him no matter who he’s interested in. She was afraid he’d get mad and cut off the friendship if she brought it up. Yeah, that’s definitely a legitimate risk. So is him opening up and being so relieved to have someone to talk to about what he's going through. As Henry Ford said, whether you think you’re right, or you think you’re wrong, either way you’re right. So, again, focus on what you want to have happen, have that emit as frequency from you and do your best. If the friend freaks out and slams the door on her, it’s just where he is right now and he got exposed when he thought he had people fooled. But, I made her promise that no matter how he reacted, she needed to understand that it was his reaction and she didn’t “cause” anything; he must own his reaction. He can take the conversation as a blessing and opportunity for acceptance and love or he can run and hide some more, and therefore everyone loses. But, he’s entitled to his process and so is everyone else.

I hope she talks to him, sooner than later. At least he’ll know there’s one friend that cares about him, wholly, honestly and completely and she’ll keep the door open for him as he’ll need a support network while he goes through his process. I was grateful she told us her situation. It reminded me once again why we did made this movie.