The Golden Corral of Tulsa, Oklahoma

We just returned from two screenings in Tulsa and although we didn't get threatened by tornado or eat fried okra, we did get to meet some amazing Okies doing amazing reconciliation work AND we buffetted at the local Golden Corral.

My family has roots in Tulsa. Portions of my family survived the Trail of Tears where the Native Americans were moved from the Carolinas and Georgia to Oklahoma and put into reservations. Most died of disease, exhaustion, etc., some made it the whole trip, some of those were the Postoaks. My great grandmother, Gracie Lynn Postoak was on the roll and was given 160 acres from the government as a "sorry" offering. She and her siblings built their houses and did all they could to survive on farming milk and corn. Then, oil was found on the family land. It was arranged that my family would see a small percentage of those profits until the well dried up. My family built their house in 1918 and we have family still living in that house. We have most of the land still and it's been quite crowded in by others building houses and commercial buildings. I just learned this weekend that the community has a legend of our family house being haunted, which I think is really cool. I get to stay in that house whenever we visit and I do feel a spirit there, most likely it's great-grandma Gracie.

I feel a connection with her. She was tough, a survivor, got divorced when it was unheardof, protected her kids as best she could, she was smart and learned skills along the way. She provided enough to get through the Depression as a single Native American mother of four. She would face off with the government when they were messing around with her oil wells, when women and especially minority women, had little to no clout or rights.

I come from a long line of strong women, I feel very fortunate to have amazing role models of entrepreneurial spirit and kick. Such is the Tulsa way where there's a great surge of churches, church leaders, Oklahomans for Equality and PFLAG coming together and coming to terms with being a part of the reconciliation movement at a local and regional level. Nestled in the Bible belt where Baptist churches hit 9000 members, they came to Circle Cinemas on Sunday afternoon for our screenings, talked with us after the Q&A and shared exciting stories of the tremendous progress happening there. There's a lot of love in Tulsa and many who aren't afraid to show it and share it.

Tulsa's community is lucky to have Circle Cinemas too...a local boy owns it who states on his business card that Circle Cinema is "Community Consciousness Through Film". He brings in diversity, global cultures and perspectives that some in Tulsa wouldn't otherwise be exposed to. He really believes in the power of film to educate and empower and wants to offer his community ways to understand the planet as a whole, so they can live out the oneness locally.

The day wouldn't have been complete without sweet tea at the Golden Corral. My great uncle and second cousin's family took us there for dinner. Apparently it was dinner time and lots of Sunday evening services had just let out. The chaos, the amount of kids, stacked dishes, food on the tables and floor was simply amazing. Buffet restaurants are the kiss of death anyway since we're encouraged to eat everything in sight and none of it is good for us. But as we sat in the back corner protecting ourselves from flying dinner rolls and belts reaching across the table slapping toddlers eating yet another cookie, I remember the phrase, "how we do anything, is how we do everything".

Where do I gorge? In what areas do I overdo it, and even if I did it a little bit, it's still not good for me? When do I lash out, throw things, leave a room trashed and not care? It doesn't have to be physical, more than likely for me it's something more emotional and verbal. So, that's what Tulsa taught me. Going from a loving, accepting, inspiring environment like Circle Cinema and moving to the Golden Corral on Sunday evening...can I be the same - grounded, loving, accepting, etc. - regardless of my circumstances and environment. I do believe I passed the test when I helped a little girl get a square of cake while she dumped two ice cream cones to the floor. It was that moment right before the explosion...her face starting to scrunch up and let it all out..and then I said, "it's all good, we'll get this cleaned up, you'll get another shot at the ice cream and we'll be back on track." She took the offer immediately and ran off with a smile. Getting another chance, reacting in gratitude, she took the opportunity and the restaurant had one less meltdown that night. That's good for all of us.